What do I do when I'm feeling very far away from my family and friends back home? I get online, first check my email (it's my homepage), then I immediately go to Facebook. I find myself on the website more and more, wanting to know what people back home are doing, trying desperately to be connected with their lives. I have to confess, I love it. I don't love all the silly applications because with my slow internet connection, it just takes too long to deal with that aspect of the site. What I do love is how connected I suddenly feel to so many of my friends and family. People constantly update their status, they comment back and forth on each other's walls, post pictures of their new babies or recent trips - the site is genius for keeping people connected and informed about each others lives. This morning I found myself on a college friend's profile and found out she's preggars. We're not that close anymore but I think of her often and love that I can still peep into her life every so often. Ok, that sounds a little stalker-ish but she agreed to be my FB friend so technically it's a mutual agreement.
What's funny is how one sided email now feels. I find that so many people don't reply very quickly to messages sent (yes, I am also a culprit of this) and it can be frustrating. I'm desperate to know what's going on back home with my ever expanding family and my far flung friends, but they all have jobs and lives that keep them very busy so their response rate isn't quite what I would like - especially when my emails can end up being pages long, I'm sure it's intimidating to respond. But I can't fault them since I seem to have a lot of time on my hands these days and I do remember what it feels like to be busy. So when I turn to Facebook, my friends beautiful faces (or strange images) of their profile pics are staring at me, smiling and inviting me to see what's new on their page. Their status message is something cryptic so I have to inquire what they mean. Or I'll find someone has left a message on my wall or commented on a picture of mine. Someone will leave a quick 2 line message for me and it's as if the thousands of miles of ocean between us is suddenly erased. The lives of my godfather, my cousins, aunts and uncles, all those who I haven't spent enough time with, are suddenly illuminated and we're connected in a way that a put off phone call, belated birthday cards or mass emails just can't even contend with.
Jason laughs at those of us who spend so much time on the site - he thinks it's just another way for people to not communicate. I can agree on some levels - that's another reason why I don't like the applications, people invite you to join their zombie game or send you plants for your garden but there is no real interaction. It tells me nothing of how much you miss me or what's on your mind. So yes, it can be another way of not communicating but as with any form of communication, there has to be some kind of initiation. The simple act of giving a thumbs up or commenting on a picture opens the door a crack and that's all it takes sometimes. And in this way, Facebook makes it easier to stay connected to the lives that would otherwise be a complete mystery. And for this, I'm thankful.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
the little job searching RPCV that could
Job searching is not easy. In the past I was very fortunate because the jobs I found seemed almost to fall in my lap. I remember after graduating from Western, I sent out probably at least 50 resumes, all focused in the event planning industry in California. I had my heart set on moving there and starting life on the West coast. My backup plan was to work these leadership conferences until something permanent came up - nothing did, I worked a few more conferences than I planned and ended up working for them full time. All the way on the other coast, in Washington DC. It worked out and there really wasn't a long period of time that I wasn't unemployed. And I'm happy that's the path that found me - it led me to many more amazing opportunities and people and now I've found myself an RPCV living in South Africa, living my dream.
Now, the reality of this dream is that currently I'm unemployed and looking for both part time work to fill the next few months until we move to Durban and a full time job that I can start once we actually get there. I'm fortunate because Jason is able to support the both of us while I sit unemployed in our living room day after day. I've been trying to convince myself that my measly efforts over the past couple months were enough to justify staring at my computer most of the day. Only last week did I realize that maybe I should put a bit more effort into it - this time the jobs just aren't falling into my lap so clearly there is more that I need to be doing. I have to get out there and do the uncomfortable which mostly consists of inviting myself into organizations that aren't actually hiring at the moment, charm them and hope they either a) find a job for me to do, or b) remember me when a position does actually open up. This requires a level of confidence that is not always easy to come by and has therefore stopped me from setting up these meetings. And when I find myself surrounded by professionals in the field that have many more years of experience/knowledge and could possibly have contacts for me, sometimes I am plagued by the insecure thoughts that I just don't know enough, I'm not worthy. Then I find myself in a situation where I should be spouting off about who I am and what I want to be doing but instead can't seem to spit a coherent word out and have just missed out on an opportunity to do some quality networking.
So here's my pep talk to myself: I can do it, I am a smart, educated woman and I can be confident (even if inside I'm thoroughly intimidated). I may not know everything but that's ok - I will show them my willingness to learn and my passion about the field. Don't focus on the feeling of not having enough experience, highlight the last 2 years, where I gained valuable insights into non-profit works as well as development and working with the community (thank you peace corps). And as Jason put it, get over the feeling of insecurity - there will always be someone smarter, wiser, more experienced and that's ok. And if all else fails, just repeat "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can." If a little engine can, so can I.
Now, the reality of this dream is that currently I'm unemployed and looking for both part time work to fill the next few months until we move to Durban and a full time job that I can start once we actually get there. I'm fortunate because Jason is able to support the both of us while I sit unemployed in our living room day after day. I've been trying to convince myself that my measly efforts over the past couple months were enough to justify staring at my computer most of the day. Only last week did I realize that maybe I should put a bit more effort into it - this time the jobs just aren't falling into my lap so clearly there is more that I need to be doing. I have to get out there and do the uncomfortable which mostly consists of inviting myself into organizations that aren't actually hiring at the moment, charm them and hope they either a) find a job for me to do, or b) remember me when a position does actually open up. This requires a level of confidence that is not always easy to come by and has therefore stopped me from setting up these meetings. And when I find myself surrounded by professionals in the field that have many more years of experience/knowledge and could possibly have contacts for me, sometimes I am plagued by the insecure thoughts that I just don't know enough, I'm not worthy. Then I find myself in a situation where I should be spouting off about who I am and what I want to be doing but instead can't seem to spit a coherent word out and have just missed out on an opportunity to do some quality networking.
So here's my pep talk to myself: I can do it, I am a smart, educated woman and I can be confident (even if inside I'm thoroughly intimidated). I may not know everything but that's ok - I will show them my willingness to learn and my passion about the field. Don't focus on the feeling of not having enough experience, highlight the last 2 years, where I gained valuable insights into non-profit works as well as development and working with the community (thank you peace corps). And as Jason put it, get over the feeling of insecurity - there will always be someone smarter, wiser, more experienced and that's ok. And if all else fails, just repeat "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can." If a little engine can, so can I.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
ten new things in Durban
Jason and I went to Durban to meet up with some friends and run some errands. Our plans had to change a bit when the beast (Jason's work vehicle) broke down right before we arrived to the backpackers. I think he may have jinked it when he said, literally 2 minutes before the awful noise and the subsequent inability to drive above 1st gear, that the truck had been driving well and maybe the last repairs were all it needed. Damn.
We managed to have a fun weekend anyway, complete with exploring new places in the city and some interesting experiences.
We managed to have a fun weekend anyway, complete with exploring new places in the city and some interesting experiences.
- Went from zero to wasted in 20 minutes after taking 4 shots, shotgunning 2 Brutal Fruits and drinking a few beers - with 3 very large Afrikaaner men and one gangly. Despite their size, they love their fruity drinks/shots and Sambuca. I vow to never drink Sambuca again. Gives me chills just thinking about it.
- Took public transport to the Essenwood Market. It's located in a nice part of town and has all kinds of trinkets to shop for - including an adorable bag made from fabric that comes from Mozambique and other great gift ideas. We had some yummy lunch and listened to a fun reggae band.
- Saw the beach at high tide, or at least since the water level has risen - the part of the beach we normally lay on was underwater and we were on top of the sand bags.
- Tried to shop for a bathing suit at both an ocean side mall and supposedly the largest (or 2nd largest) mall in the southern hemisphere - evidently the only people that wear bathing suits are the surfer girl waifs that can fit into itty bitty bikini's that wouldn't even hold one boob or cheek of a normal sized woman! Not a successful shopping trip.
- Had a delicious moroccan dinner on Davenport Rd - this great little undiscovered area (and non-touristy) that has amazing restaurants, a used book store, yoga and an organic shop that sells tahini and amazing smoothies.
- Went to the beautiful Durban Botanic gardens and had a picnic - met my friend's sort of boyfriend Max, who comes well prepared to a picnic and is full of great information and conversation!
- Saw Freshlyground, a fun South African band, in concert at the Botanic Gardens - but by the time I decided to get up and dance at the front of the crowd, it turned out to be their last song. Next time I won't be so slow moving.
- Finally visited the SunCoast Casino, which has tons of restaurants, both chain/cheesy as well as more upscale/classy, a movie theatre and yes, lots of slot machines and gambling - oh and a large population of Indians.
- Had another fabulous dinner at a Cuban restaurant at the casino and had a really amazing meal complete with a mango martini. Yum.
- Saw a movie (Gran Torino) without buying popcorn - that is a first for me and Jason, we love our popcorn. Maybe that's why I was so critical of the movie/actors.
- Got to the bus station to head to Johannesburg on Monday and found out the bus drivers were on strike. I got to ride a sub par bus line and managed to be on the road for almost 2 hours longer than necessary. Compared to other bad bus stories, I'm not complaining, but it was a new experience worthy of mentioning.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
cozy home
It's about time I introduce you to my new home in South Africa. Jason is working on a project in the Umzimkulu settlement so our home base is Ixopo at least for a few more months - it's in the KZN Province where there is TONS of rain and things to do on the weekends - a bit different from the dry somewhat dull life in Limpopo . We live on Shamrock Farm - Nick, the guy who lives here is setting up a camp for troubled youth so there is a lot of property that we are able to explore. He has a granny flat that we live in, which has 2 bedrooms, is furnished and for the most part is quite comfortable. When I first got here it rained non stop - for every 3 or 4 days of rain (and I mean constant rain), there was maybe a day or a few hours of sun. It was a bit isolating and after a few days of being stuck inside, I would start to go a bit stir crazy. But it seems that the massive rains have abated and now we have at least even number of sunny days to rainy ones.
This is Jason's office/the spare room/camping gear storage/place where I have all of my extra stuff that doesn't fit into a bookshelf or a dresser drawer. I don’t spend much time in here but Jason does.
Our living room that is my base of operations during the days. I usually spend many hours glued to my computer doing various things. Or I read on the couch. Or I work on crossword puzzles. What I wouldn't give for some Law & Order or CSI reruns!
As you can probably see, the only thing that is wrong with this little kitchen is the lack of counter space. We LOVE cooking and so preparing the meals is mostly a dance around each other and fighting over who gets the surface for chopping vegetables.
This is Sheena, she's usually outside when we open the door. She's a slut for love and barely let's us get our shoes on before a jog - she jumps and licks and gets terribly jealous if you give Tango any love at all.
And Tango - he's a ridgeback, hence the weird fur ridge on his back.
And the other rooms explain themselves. The truck though, is special - a 1970's Landcruiser. This is the beast that Jason drives for work and currently, until we buy another car, what we use to get out and about on weekends. She doesn't go above 110 km/h so we generally are never in a hurry, which is nice. He likes that it has a wench and has even had to use twice to get himself unstuck. Good times.
This is Jason's office/the spare room/camping gear storage/place where I have all of my extra stuff that doesn't fit into a bookshelf or a dresser drawer. I don’t spend much time in here but Jason does.
Our living room that is my base of operations during the days. I usually spend many hours glued to my computer doing various things. Or I read on the couch. Or I work on crossword puzzles. What I wouldn't give for some Law & Order or CSI reruns!
As you can probably see, the only thing that is wrong with this little kitchen is the lack of counter space. We LOVE cooking and so preparing the meals is mostly a dance around each other and fighting over who gets the surface for chopping vegetables.
This is Sheena, she's usually outside when we open the door. She's a slut for love and barely let's us get our shoes on before a jog - she jumps and licks and gets terribly jealous if you give Tango any love at all.
And Tango - he's a ridgeback, hence the weird fur ridge on his back.
And the other rooms explain themselves. The truck though, is special - a 1970's Landcruiser. This is the beast that Jason drives for work and currently, until we buy another car, what we use to get out and about on weekends. She doesn't go above 110 km/h so we generally are never in a hurry, which is nice. He likes that it has a wench and has even had to use twice to get himself unstuck. Good times.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
welcome back to Africa
And now I'm back in South Africa. As I was in the car on the way from the airport to Leigh's house, I was in disbelief that I was already back here. It's so cliché to say it but I can't believe how the last 3 months really flew by! After 2 1/2 weeks in Washington DC, witnessing the Inauguration and spending time with my friends and family that live there, I wasn't so sure I was ready to come back. I like life in the city, hopping on the metro to go places, going out at night, visiting the museums/memorials, just city life in general. I can't say that I was a huge fan of the cold but I could adjust to that again. Regardless of my unsettled feelings, I got on the plane, if for no other reason than to not waste the amazing bargain I got for the fare.
Immediately after getting off the plane, I was greeted by the typical TIA (this is africa) moment - a very long queue at the "All Other Passports" customs counter. Despite my best efforts, my carry on bags were still ridiculously heavy so slowly going through the line was not fun, especially after 30 hours of traveling and very little sleep. But with my new found sense of patience (thank you peace corps) I was ready to accept my fate and then was pleasantly surprised when the peeps in charge finally utilized the empty counters for the "African" and "South African" passport areas. The plus side of waiting in the line was that my bags were already on the carousel waiting for me at baggage claim.
Another TIA moment happened when I finally made it out of the baggage area and needed to find a pay phone to call Leigh, who was picking me up. The first person I asked to direct me to the pay phones actually directed me to the pay as you go phones at the end of the terminal so that didn't help. The next person directed me to the other end of the terminal to an Eskom store, that had phones but not for public use. The next person finally set me straight and directed me to the public phones. After all the running around (this time with a cart for my luggage so that was at least helpful) it all comes down to the right terminology, which I had forgotten. I made the call, although I needed to dial twice since the money went so quickly I didn't have enough time to put more in before it disconnected me. I had nothing to worry about though, Leigh was running late as usual, so I had plenty of time to wait, which is another thing you do a lot of in Africa.
After a 7 hour nap, a delicious dinner followed by Sue's famous homemade ice cream and another few hours of sleep, I was ready to make the long drive to my final destination, my new home in Ixopo with Jason. This morning I had a very non-TIA experience, the car rental agency was actually early to pick me up! This was great since I hadn't realized how long the drive was so the earlier start I could get, the better. When I got to the agency, as I was waiting for them to get my keys and contract in order, I noticed a man outside whistling while cutting the grass. This was the ultimate TIA moment - the man was on his hands and knees cutting the grass with a pair of garden clippers. Just earlier during the car ride I saw these men on the side of the road cutting the grass with an edger or a weed whacker and I thought to myself that was probably not the fastest or most efficient way of doing things - and now this! I felt bad for the guy but he didn't seem too bothered - was just whistling and doing his job.
Welcome back to South Africa! There are a lot of different things in this country that take some adjusting back to but there are also a lot of great things that I'm happy to be surrounded by again - like free baggage carts at the airport, really cheap and delicious produce, GORGEOUS scenery, easy to manage pay as you go phones, appletizers, a great selection of Lindt chocolate and Jason. Really, this girl will somehow manage a happy life here!
Immediately after getting off the plane, I was greeted by the typical TIA (this is africa) moment - a very long queue at the "All Other Passports" customs counter. Despite my best efforts, my carry on bags were still ridiculously heavy so slowly going through the line was not fun, especially after 30 hours of traveling and very little sleep. But with my new found sense of patience (thank you peace corps) I was ready to accept my fate and then was pleasantly surprised when the peeps in charge finally utilized the empty counters for the "African" and "South African" passport areas. The plus side of waiting in the line was that my bags were already on the carousel waiting for me at baggage claim.
Another TIA moment happened when I finally made it out of the baggage area and needed to find a pay phone to call Leigh, who was picking me up. The first person I asked to direct me to the pay phones actually directed me to the pay as you go phones at the end of the terminal so that didn't help. The next person directed me to the other end of the terminal to an Eskom store, that had phones but not for public use. The next person finally set me straight and directed me to the public phones. After all the running around (this time with a cart for my luggage so that was at least helpful) it all comes down to the right terminology, which I had forgotten. I made the call, although I needed to dial twice since the money went so quickly I didn't have enough time to put more in before it disconnected me. I had nothing to worry about though, Leigh was running late as usual, so I had plenty of time to wait, which is another thing you do a lot of in Africa.
After a 7 hour nap, a delicious dinner followed by Sue's famous homemade ice cream and another few hours of sleep, I was ready to make the long drive to my final destination, my new home in Ixopo with Jason. This morning I had a very non-TIA experience, the car rental agency was actually early to pick me up! This was great since I hadn't realized how long the drive was so the earlier start I could get, the better. When I got to the agency, as I was waiting for them to get my keys and contract in order, I noticed a man outside whistling while cutting the grass. This was the ultimate TIA moment - the man was on his hands and knees cutting the grass with a pair of garden clippers. Just earlier during the car ride I saw these men on the side of the road cutting the grass with an edger or a weed whacker and I thought to myself that was probably not the fastest or most efficient way of doing things - and now this! I felt bad for the guy but he didn't seem too bothered - was just whistling and doing his job.
Welcome back to South Africa! There are a lot of different things in this country that take some adjusting back to but there are also a lot of great things that I'm happy to be surrounded by again - like free baggage carts at the airport, really cheap and delicious produce, GORGEOUS scenery, easy to manage pay as you go phones, appletizers, a great selection of Lindt chocolate and Jason. Really, this girl will somehow manage a happy life here!
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